Since I do not yet have The Kids Are All Right from Netflix, and I cannot find The Fighter anywhere, this is just an interjection review so you have something to read! Enjoy.
Let's start with the bad...
The plot lacked… plot points? There was a distinct want of the protagonist (Aguilera) in the beginning of the film, however that want was satisfied before the movie was even halfway over. After that, you can discern that she simply wants to be “the best.” This is not really an attainable thing to achieve, and therefore, there’s never a point where the audience can say “she’s reached it!” This makes having a false climax next to impossible… and it equally effect’s the character’s low point. Because she was never “so close to getting the thing that she always wanted” there was no force to come and take that away from her. The film was set up decently enough, and there was a clear inciting incident and decision… but then the movie lost all of its plot steam.
There was no central antagonist causing problems for the protagonist. There were certain antagonistic forces, like the protagonist’s ex-employer, who caused the first reversal, causing her to move in with the B Story character, Jack, and thus giving them ample time to fall in love. There was a bitchy girl, Nikki (played by Kristen Bell) who worked at the Burlesque club, and who’s shoes Aguilera ends up filling in the midpoint when she allows herself to sing live on stage, but that character, after that point, loses all POWER to cause any problems for Aguilera, and simply stews in resentment in the background. There’s a rich, “I take what I want” character named Marcus at this point in the film, who’s after the protagonist for her body, but he never tries to take anything away from her. Throughout the whole film, he’s trying to buy the Burlesque club from Tess (Cher) who refuses to sell. Toward the end, Aguilera discovers that he’ll want to put up a sky-scraper in place of the club, and oh no! She’s upset. She tells Tess and they convince the man across the street to buy the air rights over the club so that he cannot build. You could call this a low point… ya know, if forgetting to put the toilet seat down and then falling in is the worst day of your life, then yes. This is a Low Point.
There’s a B Story lowpoint, yes, in which she discovers that Jack wasn’t COMPLETELY broken up with his fiancé. Oh no! But, that’s quickly resolved with very little fall out, and this movie is NOT set up as a Romantic Comedy, and therefore cannot be supported plotwise by a bulky B Story (not that it was “bulky” in the first place. It was simply much bigger than the A Story… which stopped existing after the Mid Point).
HOWEVER… (Bringing us into the good)
Because this was a musical, the plot was intervened by glamorous, lovely Burlesque numbers!
The costumes were fantastic. Typical, burlesque costume and lingerie, sailor hats, nurses’ outfits, bright red lips, and black high heels adorned the frames, as well as multiple wigs and make up styles, fit for the racier numbers, then others to go with the chic, glamorous songs. My favorite outfit of Aguilera was made completely of pearls, and during the song, she ditched the top and was campily covered by a fan of ostrich feathers, sequenced with knocking wood blocks in the song, for a true 1920’s, musical flare. Very cute, very classy, very sexy.
Furthermore, Aguilera’s voice would knock both Velma Kelly AND Roxy Heart on their asses. Cher had only two numbers in the piece- a little disappointing that they weren’t mingled within the movie and never shared in a duet, but, that is back to the writing, is it not? And we are pushing forward. Some of the best sung pieces I thought were “But I Am A Good girl,” and, “Guy What Takes his Time,” by Aguilera, and “Welcome to Burlesque” performed by Cher.
The acting was also nothing to be ashamed of. I was a little iffy, wondering if either of the two main characters could pull it off, but I thought they both did passable performances; could have been better, but they certainly could have been worse. There were also great performances included by Stanley Tucci, playing Sean, Cam Gigandet playing Jack, and Kristen Bell, playing Nikki.
The writing as I’ve said, was not the best, but there WAS a truly hilarious B Story moment between Jack and Alice (Aguilera) before their love is consummated, which I will not spoil, because apart from the musical numbers, it was the best damn part of the movie. I would recommend this movie to anyone who likes musicals for the music, or who’s into Burlesque. It gets a little chick-flicky at times, but it’s not an emotional piece (actually, I felt very little emotion at all, unless I was in awe over the dancing, or laughing my ass off at Jack).
I’d give it a 7.5/10, over all.
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